Lissy Puno talks about the key elements that can help women manage their lives better.
The C's to Life Management
No, “cash” isn’t one of them! These eight C’s—no, not “career” or “children” either—are among the key elements that strong, capable and fulfilled women are able to manage across all aspects of their lives.
If you are one of those women—or are working towards being one—you realize how important these key elements are to your well-being. You also know how to get your need for these met—on the personal level (with your spouse/partner, family members, close friends) to the work sphere whether in the home or the workplace (with your colleagues, bosses, clients) to the greater community. But it all begins with the self.
Here, then, are the eight C’s that must first take root in the self in order to influence and inspire all aspects of one’s life:
· Centeredness
· Curiosity
· Connected-ness
· Care
· Calendar
· Communication
· Cherishing
· Commitment
Centeredness refers to a realistic awareness of one’s needs and how to have them met. It means having a healthy balance between logic and emotions, knowing how to maintain equilibrium amidst pressures and stressors.
Curiosity keeps one sensitive and attuned to how you are evolving through the different phases of your life, welcoming changes—both expected and surprise ones—with a positive outlook. It also keeps you interested in and appreciative of the qualities of the important people in your life, and the growth they are going through as well.
Connected-ness means first knowing who you are, your core values, talents, and limitations. It then extends to being comfortable and confident about establishing close relationships with others—as well as working to maintain and strengthen those bonds.
Care is what many women do instinctively for others. But an empowered woman ensures her own self-care, too (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual) and is happy to receive care from others as well.
Calendar is the guide one sets to make time for yourself. A regular schedule that allocates non-negotiable “me time” (rest, exercise, vacations, hobbies, pampering) without the guilt! At the same time, it means setting regular “just you and me” times with your spouse/partner, family members, and close friends.
Communication is the lifeblood of all relationships, and an empowered woman knows that. You observe, you listen, you express ideas, feelings, concern, encouragement, humor to the significant people in your life. And you make a safe space for them to express the same to you.
Cherishing places a deep value first on the self, so that one can also value others just as deeply. It means holding oneself dear and believing that you and those close to you deserve respect, love, joy, fulfillment—and so your life choices and behavior reflect this.
Commitment means setting a direction for yourself or making a vow, and staying faithful to it. It is fidelity to self (involving all the C’s above), to another, to a cause, a passion or a vocation.
The key lies in managing how you establish and nurture these C’s for yourself, as you also live them out with others. And by the way, cash, career, and children are in that mix somewhere—or they can be, if you manage all the other C’s well!
Lissy Puno, MA is a Counselling Psychologist and a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist